Lord, let not the line at the supermarket be too long.

Let the produce be fresh and crisp,

and let there be

Just one more jar of

Kosher-for-Passover mayonnaise left.

 

You see, I forgot that there is school next week.  

And tuna fish falls off matza sandwiches so easily

When it is not held together with enough mayonnaise.

 

God, please let everyone be well for the two Seder nights.  

And while You’re at it, could You please

Keep everyone healthy and safe the rest of the year, too?

 

 And if You don’t make me spend

Hours swabbing chicken pox with calamine lotion, 

I promise that I will devote the leisure

To ecology and UJA and things like that. 

 

Almighty Father, let the children behave at the Seder table.

For I have labored so long to make everything right and lovely.

Suffer not their little fingers to spill wine on the tablecloth

and carpeting; it never seems to come out.

And let them pipe the Mah Nishtanah and Chad Gadya

In such abundant glee and wisdom

As to make the carpool line at Hebrew School worth it. 

 

King of the Universe, it seems

That I will never get all these dishes changed 

And everyone’s clothes ready, and all the chametz 

Out of the house in time.  So remember, Dear Lord, 

To please make sure Molly Maids show up.

 

Master of the World:  

Let each year our table be fuller

Not only with Your bounty, but with people –

All our loved ones, dear friends, new babies

And young lovers shyly brought home

For approval.  

 

And next year let us see our banquet seats overflowing

With our long-lost brothers and sisters who still crouch in fear.

God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob,

Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah: let me not,

In the hustle and rush of preparation, forget what

The Passover really means.

 

P.S.   I didn’t write this; if you know who’s the author please let me know and I’ll give credit where credit is due.