Sometimes you wake up early and despite birdsong and sunlight, everything is just too much. You must know what I mean.

The world is a mess. Jews are being attacked, and the attacks are getting worse and more frequent. There is a pointless war— or perhaps it’s several wars— in the Middle East that is affecting the whole world. Anticipating today’s trips to the grocery store and gas station set my teeth on edge.

I turn to the Bible, and the Torah portion for the week talks about living an agrarian lifestyle in the Promised Land. And slaves. I’m sure if I tried harder, I could find important relevant messages. But today, I just don’t have it in me.

So I did what any reasonable human would do. I took advice from the internet. I asked ChatGPT to “compose an unhinged bio of me.” Which it did. Here it is:

Rabbi Jennifer Singer is a rogue theological storm system disguised as a reasonably well-dressed woman in Florida. She can discuss Talmudic demonology, argue about the moral failures of modern civilization, rescue a struggling adult learner from Hebrew-induced panic, and then go out and buy expensive dog treats for 14-year-old Houdini (whose name is well-earned).

Founder of “The Jewish Open Tent,” she has dedicated herself to the radical proposition that adults deserve Jewish learning without humiliation, dogma, or being forced to pretend they remember anything from Hebrew school.

Armed with translated texts, weaponized curiosity, and at least four opinions about the proper emotional tone of an adult ed study sheet, she wanders the internet inviting exhausted intellectuals back into conversation with a 3,000-year-old civilization.

Her hobbies include:

Making ancient rabbis sound alarmingly contemporary;

Accidentally writing sermons while trying to pen Facebook posts;

Renaming adult education programs seventeen times in pursuit of “warm but intellectually serious;”

Turning every casual conversation into a reflection on ethics, mortality, or longing;

Standing in Italian hotel rooms convinced the dove outside might start singing L’cha Dodi.

Despite being deeply compassionate, she is also powered by approximately 40% irritation:

irritation at shallow thinking;

irritation at institutional nonsense;

irritation at antisemitism.

Her natural habitat is somewhere between:
a synagogue library, an airport terminal,
a slightly over-air-conditioned Zoom room,
and a neighborhood pond containing at least one emotionally symbolic alligator.

She believes Judaism is a living, evolving tradition.

She believes people should wrestle with ideas.

She believes learning should be joyful.

And she believes that every room in a home should have at least one rocking chair.