It’s been a while since I wrote…. mostly because I’ve felt basically empty since the High Holidays. To be honest, nothing has felt spiritual to me lately. Or even particularly religious. Which makes life a little difficult, since I’ve been leading services regularly and I have a bunch more to go before the new rabbi shows up and takes over.
By the way, regarding the Crosby Stills Nash concert (and thanks to those of you who commented): As enormously satisfying as it was to hear Marrakesh Express performed live — and it was truly phenomenal and yes, uplifting — I can’t say it was a spiritual experience. Don’t know why it doesn’t qualify, but it just doesn’t.
I know it’s not a crisis of faith, because I still believe in God (or don’t believe, depending on how you look at it) in the same way as before.
I’ve also been mulling over a comment that a Christian friend made on her facebook page. She got a job that she really wanted, and wrote “God is good” on her wall. So I’ve been wondering, if she hadn’t gotten the job, would that mean God isn’t good? I’m sure she’d say no, it doesn’t mean that at all. But I’m stuck thinking about the idea that when good things happen, God is good. I really don’t believe that.
I’m still trying to figure all this out — well, that’s probably impossible, but I can at least keep trying to figure myself out, right? And will try to write more, but for tonight, that’s enough. Sorry to let you down.